I'm starting to get the feeling that my mere presence lowers people's IQs. Here some some instances to back up my observation (and these don't even mention the awful drivers I seem to see every time I get behind the wheel):
- Me: "So, I was reading about this research being done by a doctoral student at Dalhousie University blah blah blah."
Other guy: "Research by a doctoral student at a university? Sounds pretty sketchy to me."
Ummmm....you mean at an educational institute where people do research to be recognized (the bread and butter for a scientist) rather than for maximizing profit (like in a corporation)? Where this person will not achieve his dream of a PhD unless he can rigorously defend his research face to face with his peers and superiors actively trying to attack his research?
Yeah. University research, esp. at a place like Dal, is totally sketchy.</sarcasm>
- After talking about Jesus' standard for adultery ("If you even look at a woman with lustful intent, you have already committed adultery in your heart") someone said "And it's morals like that which prevented Christianity from ever making it big beyond the first century."
- When discussing the cost of home ownership and whether or not I could afford it, I pulled out my iPhone to use the calculator someone said "Put your calculator away! This is no time to make calculations! You just have to do it!"
- "You should cheat on your taxes because when you pay your taxes, all you're doing is supporting welfare cheats." Besides the implication that two wrongs do make a right, does this person think the whole tax system exists to give money to "welfare cheats"? A quick and dirty calculation reveals that less than 1% of your actual tax dollars goes to welfare recipients. (Same guy said this as #3.)
- In reference to someone saying something similar to #4; "Remember that at election time." Yeah, whatever you do, don't vote for the party that's in favour of people cheating the system! Whichever party that is.
- "You shouldn't complain about a late night party. Free music is always a good thing." Well....unless you have a migraine, or are sick, or have to get up early to work, or, in this exact case, the party is several kilometres away and the solution is to put the speakers up on stands. (This incident refers to Ottawa Folkfest 2014.)
- "Einstein was an idiot." You lose a lot of credibility when you say this.
- "The Bible can't be true because the Hebrews never would have been slaves because they weren't black." Because the only slaves in history were black. </sarcasm>.
- "I f&#%@ing hate unions!" After having lost his job due to a layoff in a unionized environment; instead of been shown the door and perhaps being given a severance cheque (like in a non-unionized place), this person was given the option of 1) leaving immediately with severance pay, 2) sticking around for a year to find another job in the (rather large) organization, or 3) taking some money, going to school to upgrade his skills, then come back to work being put on a priority list to look for a position within the (rather large) organization. He took the third option, and had found a job and was complaining that he might not start at the top of the pay scale, instead of having to work up through a few years of guaranteed raises.
- Me in December, 2012: "I just have this really ominous feeling that 2013 is going to be a bad year for me." Other person: "You'll just have to make it a good year then.". I knew at that point of a few changes coming up that were going to negatively affect my life. Besides that there was a mass exodus of my social circle. (Approximately 19 friends moved away that year. For context: in January of 2012 I didn't have 19 friends in Ottawa.) Aside from that there were a few things too personal for this blog. By December I knew I was right: 2013 is probably on record as being one of my worst years so far, and the vast majority of the good and the bad (of any year for that matter) was well beyond my control.
Some honourable mentions:
- "You shouldn't rent because when you rent, you're just throwing your money away." This is an honourable mention because a lot of people say it, and it is technically true, and still may be practically true in some cases, in some parts of the world. But not in Ottawa in 2015. The implication is usually that when you own, you're not throwing your money away. To see why this is wrong, you have to use something called a 'calculator'.
- "Hello, help desk support? My Microsoft isn't working." This is honourable mention because a lot of non-techies wouldn't know what's wrong with that. However, this was uttered as I was walking through my office. I work in IT.
- "Canada is the most taxed country in the world." I'm calling this an honourable mention because it's really hard to verify the veracity of this statement. Do they mean the most amount of distinct taxes? The highest tax percentages for Sales tax? Property tax? Income tax? What tax bracket are we talking about? However, it made the list because upon a quick Google search reveals, by most measures, Canada's not even in the top ten.
- "If you're trying to sleep while your neighbours are partying, just wear earplugs." Have you ever actually tried earplugs? They muffle sound, not cut it out entirely. Also, have you ever tried sleeping with earplugs in your ears? I moved this one to the honourable mentions because it turns out that ear plugs actually do work for a lot of people for some noises. I've found out that I have a weirdly shaped ear that makes it very difficult for any ear plug to stay in. I've tried many types of earplugs. I've twisted, scrunched, pulled on my lobes, done every thing I could think of, but I can't seem to get any to stay in my right ear for very long.
