Sleepers vs. Non-Sleepers

A couple of weeks after moving into my new apartment, there was a power-outage that lasted from 10:30 at night to about 4:30 in the morning. It was July. I live on the top floor. My room got very warm very quickly.

During the power outage, my apartment was very quiet. Sort of. There are two types of noise: white noise, and non-white noise. I normally sleep with the air conditioner and a fan on. The building's ventilation system makes a certain amount of white noise. That was all silenced. Now, I could hear all the non-white noise, such as people talking in adjacent units, cars driving by on the streets, dogs barking in the distance, etc.

I didn't get to sleep that night until about 4:30 AM. When I told this story to the McQueens Robin laughed and said I was the only person she knew who wouldn't be able to sleep at night during a power-outage. I tried to explain the difference between white noise and non-white noise, and how I can sleep with white noise, but not non-white noise. She didn't buy it. Jack suggested that there seem to be two types of people in the world: sleepers and non-sleepers, and sleepers will never understand non-sleepers.

Sleepers are people that go to bed and sleep. They sleep because they want to sleep. Or because they're comfortable and tired. I was a sleeper when I was a teenager.  Actually, most teenagers are.

A non-sleeper can't just go to sleep. They need certain conditions to be in place. During the day, I am a sleeper. At night, I'm a non-sleeper. In the day, I can sleep while sitting upright on a noisy, hot, crowded bus with my head against the bouncing window. But at night, I need everything to be just so.

So I started contemplating the difference between sleepers and non-sleepers, trying to develop a theory as to what makes one one and not the other. Then I stumbled across Today's Articles. It turns out that science already has answers.

When you're awake, your brain produces high frequency brain waves. As you fall deeper into sleep, your brainwaves lower in frequency.  Every now and again, while sleeping, a spurt of higher frequency waves are produced. Those spurts are called "spindles". The scientists found that people who produce more spindles don't get woken up as easily as those who produce fewer spindles.

Unfortunately, the question of "how do I make my brain create more spindles?" remains unanswered.

Church Hopping - Part 5

Since my last Church Hopping instalment I have visited a few new churches. Since then I have been to:

Treevale Pentecostal

Being a Pentecostal Church, I knew not to expect an orderly service like what I'm used to at Baptist churches. Some of the stereotypes proved to be true. Singing was pretty repetitious. Overall the music was good. The preaching was probably not bad - most of the time. I don't want to start a holy war here, but I happened to visit this church on Pentecost Sunday. So, of course, the sermon was on Tongues. Every time I visit a non-Baptist church I am reminded about how Baptist I am. This time was no exception.
As for Friendliness, I found it somewhat lacking, which is to be expected in a church that large I suppose. But the pastor did make a point of coming and talking to me, which was good.

Village Pentecostal

I keep going to churches on the wrong Sundays. I went to Chedarview Alliance the day they had the longest preacher in history. I went to Treevale Pentecostal on Pentecost Sunday.  I went Village Pentecostal on what turned out to be a very Pentecostal service. The singing started. But it never ended. They never did get to the sermon. They just got swept up in things. They sang for about 2 hours. But, being Pentecostal, they have a penchant for repetition. In those two hours, I think they only sang 3 songs.
Afterword a few people came to talk to me and assured me it wasn't usually like that, and they hoped I'd come back again. Which I did. Last Sunday I went there again. This time there was an actual sermon. Again, I couldn't help thinking about how Baptist I am. The music was very repetitious. When people talk to me at that church, they're always wondering what I thought of the service, and wondering if I'll come again. It's like they're insecure and asking me "So.....how did we do? How do you like us so far?"

West-Fence Alliance

This church was so-so on the friendly scale. A couple of people made sure they shook my hand and said "hi" as I walked in, but then they went back to what they were doing before. Afterwords, a few people came up to me to talk to me and told me they hoped I'd come back. The preacher was a guest, so I'll have to go back to hear the regular pastor at some point. The music wasn't bad, but it did make me miss Blackbelt Baptist's music. West-Fence does what most other churches do with their music. They play contemporary music - written to be led by guitar and vocals, and led with the piano. They didn't even have a guitarist there that morning (ministry opportunity for me!), so that could be the reason. But, it made me appreciate Blackbelt Baptist all the more.
I have since been back thrice.  One time they had two announcements that should have each taken five minutes.  They each took about 10 to 15 minutes, leaving the preacher with hardly any time to race through his sermon.
I went a third time where the preacher spoke for 45 minutes.  I'm not sure if I happen to be going on the wrong Sundays, or if those Sundays are the norm.  I'll have to continue to investigate.
As of writing this, I just went there again this morning.  This time the sermon was 55 minutes long.  It didn't feel like it - which is good.  It felt more like 35 minutes.

Chedarview Alliance - Again

The McQueens wanted to check this church out one Sunday, so I said I'd meet them there. I figure they wouldn't have the world's most boring preacher back again. I would give it another chance. This time the preaching was great! They showed a video of Andy Stanley. As for friendliness, no one would shake my hand, not even the people handing out bulletins. Not only would they not shake my hand, they wouldn't even make eye-contact with me! That's it. I'm definitely not going back.

That one in Farhaven

I forget the name of this church, so I can't come up with a pun-based pseudonym for it.  Pastor Jack was preaching here one Sunday morning, so I went. It was a small church in a school gym. The music was decent for what it was. The preaching was great. And the friendliness was also pretty good. However, it is too far for me to go every week. And, for fellowship reasons, I think I want a larger church.

St. Albany

This is part of the Anglican Network. We were told it had a cool young adults group. So we went to check it out. They had an after church social (which seems to be an Anglican thing) in the church basement. It took a few minutes, but people were eventually friendly. They took my email addy for the young adults group. Unfortunately, they meet at a time that's inconvenient for me.
The music was decent. The seats, however, were very uncomfortable. They were old-school pews with very little leg room.
For communion, they gave the option of drinking from a communal cup, or individual tiny glasses. If you know me, you already know I opted for the individual glasses. But when I got to the front, the person in front of me got the last individual glass. I had to go for the communal cup. Eeeeewwwwww!
Again; I am very Baptist.

So, this February will mark two years since we left Yahoo! Baptist, and I still don't have a regular church family. I might have to re-evaluate my church-selection criteria.

Did You Wash Your Hands?

Anyone who knows me knows how I am about washing hands. I become aware of when I touch something that will cause me to have to wash my hands before touching food. When I'm eating at a function where hand-shaking is required, I shake with my right hand, and handle food with my left. When I have breakfast in a restaurant, pick up my toast with my left hand, and use my right hand for things like the Ketchup bottle, or the salt and pepper shakers - which are rarely washed.

In Today's Article, we get another hand-washing hint. If you wash your hands, and put them below an air-dryer, and rub your hands together it actually brings bacteria out from the pores in your hands, increasing the overall bacteria count on your hands from when you just finished washing your hands. The next best thing to do is not rub your hands.

But the best thing to do is to dry your hands with a paper towel. Using a paper towel allows you to turn off the tap without touching the tap that you touched with your dirty hands, and you can open the door without touching the handle.

The Whole Couch Situation

I hate red-tag sales. I hate one-day-only sales. I hate pressure sales. When I make purchases under duress, I end up with Buyer's Remorse. The latest instalment in that story is my couch.

One week ago I decided to go couch shopping. I meant to go out and look. Sit. Lie down. Take measurements. Compare prices. My furniture budget had been depleted down to about $360. I didn't intend to buy - at least not that day.

I went with the McQueens. They have an eye for things like colour and design, etc. I don't. They're artists. Actuall artists. I draw on coffee cups. I'm an engineer at heart, and a computer programmer by profession. I value things like function and efficiency. To me function comes way before form. When my brother and I were both learning to program, he'd create beautiful user interfaces. I'd have black and white command line programs.

Before this ouch-shopping day, I had been to Ikea countless times sitting on their couches, trying to decide what I might like. I like Ikea furniture.  I realized the other day why Ikea doesn't have salespeople.  The furniture sells itself.  So far, I have bought a chair, ottoman, stool, a dinning table, 4 dinning chairs, and DVD/CD shelves from Ikea, and I don't regret a single purchase. But, I haven't found an Ikea couch I really like that's comfortable - at least in the Ottawa Ikea. Perhaps cushions become softer with use?

I decided on a few things I wanted, and didn't want in a couch:

Not leather

Leather looks nice, but if it's hot or cold, the couch becomes very uncomfortable.

None of those little buttons in the upright cushions

I always manage to cause them to pop out. If I'm going to spend at least a grand on my couch, I don't want to have to worry about damaging it so easily. It would be one thing if I did it, but if someone else did it, that's frustrating in a different way.

Flat arms

When I was in university I had the ugliest couch and chair set. but the arms were about 5" wide, solid wood, and flat. I would often use it as a TV tray, and would leave my glass, pop can, and/or plate on the arm.

Long enough for me to sleep on

I figure a couch is like a substitute bed. It's going to get slept on. You want that to be a comfortable sleep. My couch in university was like that. I took a lot of naps on that couch. It was the perfect size, even if it was ugly.

Right price

If it was too cheap...well, I believe that you get what you pay for. If it's too expensive, I'd break the bank. I don't want that. I don't want to think about how much flying I could have done with that couch money. I had about $360 in my couch fund, but, given a few more pay-cheques, that could increase. I was planning on spending about a grand on a couch.

The first store the McQueens and I walked into was Dufresne (pronounced Dufrane, rhyiming with Moo-Frame, with the epmhasis on "Frame".). We were greeted by a loud salesman informing us it was their VIP red-tag day. One day only! We were shown a bunch of couches. Most where "meh". Then we sat on one. Oh my goodness! So comfortable! So soft! I just sank in! I wanted it! There was a couch and love seat. There was also a single chair, end tables, and coffee tables too that could come as a package. I wanted the couch. The loveseat was negotiable.

But, I wanted to look around first. After Dufresne, we went to Sears, Lay-Z-Boy, and United Furniture Warehouse. I sat in nothing that compared to that couch at Dufresne. So I went back to Dufresne, got a good deal on the couch and loveseat. I saved $700 from the list price. I set up the delivery for the following Saturday.

On Saturday it showed up. After much struggling to get it into the aprtment, I played with a few different arrangements. I sat in them for a while. I looked at my bank accounts, and finance spreadsheets. Buyer's Remorse started sinking in. Now I'm thinking of returning, either just the loveseat, or both. The return policy is that they'll refund 90% of the money (10% is a re-stocking fee), and I'll have to pay for a pick-up. And, I only have 48 hours to decide. 48 hours, presumably, from delivery, not purchase. That's not a very long period, especially when you're spending, potentially thousands of dollars.  I kinda feel like punishing the company for such poor customer service policies.

I have the following issues with the couch and love seat:

1. It's big. It takes up a lot of space in my small apartment.
2. It's heavy. This is a problem if I want to move it around.
3. It's big and heavy. It had to be disassembled to get into the apartment. You should have seen the delivery guys grunting and sweating trying to get it in. If I have to move without the convenience of professional movers, that's gonna be me - except that I'm not a big, strong, professional furniture delivery man.  I'm a computer programmer.
4. It's expensive. Even though I got a wicked deal on it, I'm still gonna have rob, not only Peter, but Frank, Chester, Sebastien, and Mary, just to pay Paul. This is actually the least of my concerns. I have the money to pay for it. I just have to pray that I have no unexpected expenses for the next few months while I recoup the losses.
5. It's expensive. I don't like having expensive things. You always worry if it's gonna break down or get stolen or something. I've seen someone puncture a car seat simply by leaving a pencil in their pants pocket. I don't want to worry about things like that.
6. It doesn't have removable cushions. Removable cushions are nice if you need to turn them over if someone spills something, or if you need to lay them out on the floor as a make-shift bed.
7. It's not _quite_ long enough for me to completely lie down on. I know this conflicts with problems 1 and 3, but if it's gonna be too big to get in my apartment without disassembling it, I want a good bed substitute.
8. It's not _me_. You know how some furniture just has _you_ written all over it? I bought these chairs from Ikea. Solid pine. Light. Assembly was ridiculously easy. $25 a piece. And they go with my table, which is also me because of the way it extends. My problem is that I don't know if a couch exists that is Me.
   

I should also list some of the positives of the couches (and my answers to them):

The two of them together makes sitting possible for 5 people. That's good for entertaining lots of guests.

I rarely entertain. I don't like entertaining. Having super-comfortable seating is just an invitation for people to want to come over.

It's super-comfortable.

At least at first. After sitting in it for a while, I'm not sure it feels all that good. I bought an office chair from Staples once. Felt great there. When I got it home and sat in it for a couple of hours, as computer programmers are wont to do, my back was killing me! I had to sit in my old, uncomfortable chair for a while before I could sleep at night. It turns out the comfortable chair was actually uncomfortable, and the uncomfortable chair was actually comfortable. This is important, as I will no longer be regularly seeing a chiropractor at the end of this month.

The green couch goes well with my burgundy carpet.

I don't care. I am such a form-before-function guy. I only know that it goes well because the McQueens told me it would. I would have still bought the couch if they said "No.  It will totally clash with your carpet."  I bought it because it was comfortable.  In fact, my decorating mission statement was "I want the apartment to look like a grown non-student lives there. I don't want your used stuff. I want new stuff. But I wanted to leave room for a "woman's touch".  Furthermore, if I move in a year or two - which is entirely possible - it is unlikely I'll be moving into a place with burgundy carpets. I suppose I could get a burgundy rug. Or just spill some red wine on the floor, and not clean it up.

 

If I return it, they keep 10% of the price as a re-stocking fee. I also have to pay for, and arrange (including reserving the service elevator in my building) a pick-up. Plus, I'd have to do all this shopping all over again. This could turn out to be a $200+ oops.

Oops.

So I have to decide by tomorrow what I'm going to do.

For reference, here's a picture of my couch from my university days:

And here's the couch I just bought:

The Blinds Side B

Recap: If you missed it last week, I spent a lot of time and gas trying to find affordable blue PVC horozontal blinds for my bedroom and living room of my new apartment. Every store either had an extremely limited selection and/or were going to charge me an arm and a leg. The only good option I could find was to order from Sears online. So I did.

When I got the first blinds, I checked online how to install blinds. I would need wall anchors. I went to Home Depot to ask about them. The first guy I talked to was useless. He told me I'd need to find a stud.  [Insert joke about the stud being 'right here']  If I had wooden studs I wouldn't need anchors. Otherwise, I would.

In fairness to him, he might not have been talking to me.  He wouldn't make eye contact with me and he was speaking loud enough for everyone in a 3 kilometre radius to hear.

So I found someone else who was much more helpful.  In fact people were crowding around him waiting for their chance to glean some home-reno wisdom from him.  He showed me where to get the wall anchors, and a stud finder.  [Insert joke about the stud being 'right here'] He told me what I needed to know. I bought some wall anchors and a stud finder [Insert joke about the stud being 'right here'] and went home.

I wanted to install the blinds in my bedroom first. I put my bed by the window so I could stand on it as I installed the blinds. I drove the anchor into the wall with my screwdriver. It took a bit of effort at first, then there was no resistance.  I took the anchor out.  I looked in the hole and saw that there was a metal plate with holes in it. I managed to put the anchor through one of the holes.

I thought I'd better ask the Super about installing blinds before I go any further. He suggested I install the brackets a little closer to the window. The window sill is pretty deep. So I tried that and it worked. The blind went in without trouble or incident. I didn't install the other blind in the living room because I didn't have a chair, stool, ladder, or bed to stand on to install the brackets.

I ordered the two custom fit blinds. When they arrived I decided to install the blind in the bedroom first. This one took a lot more effort than the other one. In fact, I ended up tearing some skin on my hand holding the screw driver. It hurt. One of the anchors was going in vertically, until it encountered some resistance. Then it went diagonal. Then it stopped before it was all the way in. In my effors I ended messing up the head of the anchor, so I couldn't unscrew it. If anyone knows how to remove one of those, let me know.

At this point you're probably asking two questions: "Why didn't you use a drill?" and "Didn't you use your stud finder?" The answer to the first question is that I did use the drill and that's how the anchor got messed up. After that I didn't want use the drill until I knew things were exactly right. It's a lot harder to undo something that's been done with a power tool than something that's been done by elbow grease. 

The answer to the second question is that I did use the stud finder. [Insert joke about the stud being 'right here'] But, according to my stud finder, my window sill is one giant stud. So, I deemed it to be useless. It works fine on my walls, just not the window sill.

I tried again a little bit closer to the center. This time it worked. When I tried putting the screws in, 3 out of 4 went in easily. The fourth one stopped part way up. My hand really hurt, and I was sweating like that guy landing the airplane at the end of the move Airplane. I was tired. The bracket wasn't going anywhere. The screw wasn't getting in the way. So I left it.

Before installing the blinds in the living room I wanted to 1) let my hand heal, and 2) get a stool, or chair, or ladder to stand on. I figured a chair would be good because I would use it to sit at my table when I got one of those. Off to Ikea!

I must have sat in every chair in the kitchen area. I couldn't decide on a chair or a table. And I wanted them to be coordinated. As I sat there contemplating what to do, I saw a footstool. I walked over to it. It was new to the Ikea lineup. It was $15. It was solid wood. It was almost 2 feet tall. It was perfect! I could use it as a makeshift end-table, or rest my feet on it under my desk. I decided not to decide on a dinning set that day, and just get the stool.

Of course, they didn't have any of those stools in stock. The guy there said they didn't know when they would get any more. I checked their website everyday for two weeks until it was in stock. I bought it. I put it together. Due to a sharp edge in the packaging, I managed to cut my wrist. Now I look like an emo-kid.

This Sunday past, I was sitting in my living room looking at my blindless windows. I had marked out where I would put the anchors. I decided to get a start on it.  The skin on my hand had partially healed.  I had to install 2 blinds, 4 brackets, 8 screws and 8 wall anchors. After six anchors, skin had ripped off the palm of my hand again. I gave it a rest. Until last night, Wednesday night. I decided to takle the last two anchors. I decided I was on a roll, so I kept going. I drove in the screws holding up the anchors. I put the blinds in. Finally, my living room is dark. It might be worth trying to cool down my entire apartment with the air conditioner. My hand hurts. I have several blisters and cuts. I guess thats what you get when you try to do some manual labour after a lfietime of computer programming.

The Blinds Side A

I have been in my apartment for a month and a half now, and I finally got my window blinds up last night. What took me so long? Procrastination? Yes. Laziness? Yes. But that's not all. It turns out that getting and installing blinds isn't as easy as it used to be, or should be. It turned out to be a real vortex!

The last time I had an apartment that needed blinds, I measured the windows and went out to Zellers. I found the ones that would fit in the colour I wanted (dark blue). I brought them home. Since I knew nothing about installing blinds I had a friend over to help me. He brought his drill. We got some wall anchors and installed the blinds in one evening. I didn't have a steady job at the time, and still going to school, so I wouldn't have been willing to spend a whole lot.  Four blinds about 3 feet each probably cost me less than $100.

I thought it would be that easy this time too. Boy was I wrong!

I measured my windows. 5 foot, 11 and a three-quarters inches. What an odd measurement! Why don't they make windows a standard size? Why couldn't they have been an even six feet?

I wanted mini, a.k.a. horizontal blinds. I wanted dark blue.

One day I went to Home Depot. As soon as I found the window area I saw three employees hanging around talking. I thought "Great! I can ask one of them for help." Boy was I wrong! As I was approaching I heard one of them say "I'm hungry. You guys want to get some lunch?" They all agreed and scattered like cockroaches when you turn on the lights. I was on my own. So I went looking. There are lots of different kinds of blinds; wood, faux-wood, S-blinds, mini, PVC, etc. etc. The only mini blinds I could find were coloured white and off-white.

So, off to Walmart! They only had white. Someone there told me for better selection to check out Sears.

So I went to sears. The woman there first asked me if I was renting or owning. What an odd question. I told her I was renting. She told me I'd be better off ordering online, or from the catalog. If I ordered in store, it would cost me upwards of $250 for one set of blinds.  I could get the exact same thing for as little as $27 from the catalog.

So I figured I'd order them online. I left the store. As I was driving out, I saw a store called Blinds to Go. Perfect! Blind experts! So I went in. They quoted me $150 for each blind. I needed 2.  Forget that noise!

This was getting frustrating. I tried Bouclaire. They only had white and faux-wood.

I went back to Home Depot. This time I managed to get a salesperson to talk with. If I wanted blue blinds I'd need to get them custom ordered, and that could run well over $100 per blind.

What ever happened to cheap non-white blinds?!

Ikea had limited selection. As did Zellers. As did the Bay. I forget what other stores I checked out, but none had what I wanted.

I went to the Sears website to order. I was nervous about ordering custom blinds. What if they were wrong somehow? Could I return them? Their return policy doesn't allow custom blinds to be returned. So, instead of ordering one blind for the whole window, I decided to order two 3 foot blinds, and two 2 foot, 11 and a half inches. I would order the two 3 foot blinds first because they weren't custom. If they weren't any good, I could return them. Once I was satisfied, I'd order the custom blinds.

This entry is getting long, so I'll stop now, and continue next week.

Ontario Driving Laws

I'm from Nova Scotia. I learned to drive in Nova Scotia. Then I moved to Ontario where I have lived in Sault Ste. Marie, Toronto, and Ottawa. I have noticed there are a few different laws in Ontario that you may need to be aware of if you plan on driving in this province. I will outline them here for your convenience.

The eighth-of-a-second rule.

In most places this is known as the Two-Second Rule. Here's the way it works.
Watch the car in front of you.  When that car passes a pole or mark on the road, start counting "one one-thousand, two one-thousand."  If you pass by the mark before you finish counting to two, you're following too close. In Ontario, it's an eighth of a second. Not two seconds. Two seconds is too long. How can you expect everyone to fit on the roads if they all follow the two-second rule?

Also note that in most places the number of seconds increases with the size of the following vehicle. If you're driving a school bus, you should probably be counting to 4 because your brakes will take longer to stop your bus than the Honda Civic you're following. In Ontario, it's the opposite. The bigger and heavier your vehicle, the closer you must follow.

Signaling

Anyone caught using their signal lights to show intention of changing lanes, or turning onto another street, driveway, etc. shall be sentenced to life in a maximum security prison with no chance of parole. Ever. - Ontario Highway Traffic Act.

They've attached the hefty penalty because they're so serious about this. They do not want people showing intention of turning by use of signal lights. 98% of Ontarian drivers obey this law without fail.

However, signaling you're going to turn, then not turning - even though you're in the turning lane - is quite fine. Leaving your signal light on while driving down the highway while never changing lanes is also fine.

Pullling Out Into Traffic:

It is advisable to look both ways before pulling out into traffic from a perpendicular street or driveway, but please ignore how fast any oncoming vehicles are going.

Merging:

When two lanes become one, and traffic must merge, all cars must do as much as possible to prevent the merging to look like a giant zipper from the sky. If you're in the lane that's ending, you must drive as fast as you can to force your way into the furthest forward, however inconvenient to other drivers, giving up as many open spaces as possible. You were probably taught in school never to cut in line. That applies to the cafeteria; not roads.

The following rules apply specifically to Ottawa:

Red Lights

In most places red traffic lights mean stop! In Ottawa, they're just suggesting you might want to stop. If you feel like it. Otherwise, just go right through the intersection at any speed you feel is appropriate - as long as it's at least 90 km/h.  Besides, the Yellow Lights are mere flashes in Ottawa.

Lane Choice on the Queensway

Most highways operate in the following manner: The far right lane is the slowest. The far left lane is the fastest. Traffic moves faster as the lane moves farther left. If the posted speed limit is 100 km/h, people in the far right lane might go 100 km/h on an ideal day.  If people want to go faster, they use the left lane(s) to pass.

This is how the Queensway operates: The posted speed limit is - oh never mind. It doesn't matter. Feel free to do anything between 50 and 180 km/h. Don't worry about being in the wrong lane for your speed. There is no wrong lane. However, if you find another vehicle going the same speed as you, it is an offence punishable by death to occupy the same lane. You have to adjust your speed until you're right beside the other vehicle, then resume your original speed. This prevents anyone from passing you.

Also, you are required by law to change your speed by at least 20 km/h at every exit. It doesn't matter if you speed up or slow down - as long as you're within the 50 -180 km/h buffer.

Also, don't let the weather interfere with your driving habits. If you want to go 180 km/h on a bright sunny day in July, then you must also go 180 km/h during an ice storm in January. It's the law. By the same token, if you'd do 50 km/h during an ice storm, then you must also do 50 km/h on a clear and sunny day.

The following pertain to Embrun:

Posted Speed Limits:

The posted speed limits around Embrun are in French. While the numbers look the same as English numbers, their meanings are quite different.

Between the 417 and the town of Embrun, the posted speed limit looks like 80 km/h to an anglophone like myself. But, as I have found out, when you do the conversion to English numbers, it's actually 120 km/h. If you do 80 km/h, you will be passed as though you're standing still.

But once you get into Embrun, it works the other way. The posted speed limit is 50 km/h. Or at least that's what it looks like in English. But once you translate it into the native French, it's actually more like 30 km/h.  You can try to do 50 km/h, but you will be promptly slowed down to 30 km/h by the car in front of you.

Hey. I don't make the rules.  I just break 'em.