Friday, February 09, 2007

Gee....Ya Think?

And here I was worried that I'd be running out of "Today's Article" articles then I saw this article in Psychology Today.

Executive Summary:
Women send mixed messages to men.

Of course, I think the whole thing about reading women has a few problems. For one thing, when it comes to signals it is 100% unimportant what signals are sent (from either sex). The only important thing about signals is what is being received, which may not be (and in many cases is not at all) what is being sent.

For example, I have heard of the following signal as a way to tell if a girl likes you from two completely separate and distinct sources (except that they're both women):
You walk into a room, and if a girl likes you she'll start whispering with her girlfriend(s), occasionally looking at you, and the only thing you may hear is giggling.

Signal being sent from girl to guy: "I like you, that's why I'm talking about you, and giggling, with my girlfriends. This should get your attention."

What a guy (remember ladies, guys are usually pretty logical) thinks when he sees this: "I walk in and she starts whispering, followed by laughter. They keep looking at me. It must be about me. They're whispering, therefor I must not be supposed to hear what they're saying. If they're trying to prevent me from hearing what they're saying then it's probably not good. If it's probably not good then it's probably bad. Oh great, and now they're giggling. This must mean they're making fun of me."

If the guy has any insecurities about anything, he assumes they're probably making fun of that. So in the effort to send out "notice me" signals, the girls have probably made the man feel pretty small, annoyed, and the opposite of what the intended effect is.

This is the first thing that will drive a guy away. The second part of this scenario is that it is very difficult for a guy to try to pick up a girl when she's with friends. Especially after the whole lot of them were busy making fun of him a minute ago.

Apparently, this signal is spread across many cultures and many times, as are many signals women send to men. And women all seem to know all these signals. It's like they all got together and drew up a body-language dictionary of signals to send men to show interest. But what I find funny is that nobody has bothered to tell men what these signals are. So guys are left to their own devices when it comes to decoding signals women send. Ladies, this is generally how a man interprets signals: "If I were to do that, what would it mean? Would I mean to be showing romantic interest? Or just friendship? Or general disgust?"

So, this was just one of those studies that shows something that a lot of people already know, like when a study comes out that says "eating vegetables is good for you, and eating lead-based paint is bad for you."

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